a bit of self-indulgent hilarity
“THE TEN WORST FILMS OF ALL TIME, AS REVIEWED BY EZRA POUND OVER ITALIAN RADIO”
by Greg Purcell
1. Bambi
Filth.
2. Casablanca
This movie is filth.
3. Cat People
A race may civilize itself BY LANGUAGE, not film. Cat People is filth.
4. Gentleman Jim
To the Animals who made this usurious film: god damn you.
5. The Magnificent Ambersons
This movie is indistinguishable from the filth-rustlings of swine in a sty.
6. The Man Who Came to Dinner
May you choke on it, bacilli.
7. Yankee Doodle Dandy
I sort of liked James Cagney’s filthy Irish energy in this one.
8. The Palm Beach Story
Bless: The Italian Dolcestilnovisti, the “sweet new style” current in the time of the papish Guelphs
and the imperial Ghibellines. One will particularly take heed of its foremost practitioner, Guido Cavalcanti.
Blast: Preston Sturges and the Jewish moneylenders who helped him make this film.
9. Now, Voyager
Two boils for the director’s infected liver.
10. This Gun for Hire
This film reeks of syphilis. Filth.
Printed in “CREATED IN DARKNESS BY TROUBLED AMERICANS: THE BEST OF McSWEENEY’s HUMOR CATEGORY”
Oh, the convulsions of laughter that took hold when first reading this…